Coffee
The reason the doors open. Order it however you like it — nobody behind this counter has ever judged a syrup pump, and nobody ever will.
A veteran-owned coffee shop on Red Bank Road, run by a husband and wife who have been pouring for this town since 2014. Come for the coffee. Stay because nobody rushed you.
Not everybody who walks in wants an espresso, and we made our peace with that a long time ago. Here is the whole spread.
The reason the doors open. Order it however you like it — nobody behind this counter has ever judged a syrup pump, and nobody ever will.

For the mornings when your body wants fruit and your brain wants a nap. We can’t fix that. We can blend it.

Fizzy, cold, and just fancy enough to feel like a decision you made on purpose.
Bubbles and syrup. Dessert you’re allowed to have before ten in the morning.
For the people who came in with the coffee crowd and are quietly better rested than all of them.
Green, grassy and weirdly effective. No, we will not make it taste like coffee.
Somebody is here long before you are, and this is what they are doing. Sweet on one side of the case, savory on the other, and both of them warm at some point this morning.
What’s in the case is whatever came out of the oven today. It moves. That is sort of the point of a place like this.
We don’t print the pastry list, because it would already be a lie by lunchtime. Come look in the case.
About the name
People have been asking about it since 2014 and we have never felt any pressure to settle it. Ask at the counter. You will get an answer — we just can’t promise it’s the same one the person ahead of you got.
Bald Monkey Beanery was started in 2014 by a husband and wife, and it is still veteran owned and run by the same two people who decided a town like this deserved better coffee than it had.
Twelve years later there is exactly one Bald Monkey, and it is on Red Bank Road in Goose Creek. We have never wanted a second one. We would rather get this one right, remember your order, and keep the jokes on the board coming.
Did you know you can slap a croissant hard enough to bake it? Well now you know— An actual post, from the actual people who run this place
That is a lot of reviews for one coffee shop in one town, and we are as surprised by it as anyone else is. We are not going to pretend it happened by accident, though — twelve years of showing up will do it, and so will remembering how you take it.





One location, and this is it. No second shop, no other town — just the one on Red Bank Road.
Call ahead, ask what’s in the case today, or settle a bet about the name.
That is where we can keep them honest, so that is where they live. Or ring us and a human will tell you straight.
Bad coffee jokes, worse puns, and the occasional actual announcement. Mostly the jokes.